which way is north?

So a lamp post, a rottweiler and a thumb tack all walked into a bar.

The bartender was a little confused, as at that time of day he was more used to seeing a walnut, an aglet and the number seven walking in.

Regardless, the rottweiler barked unintelligibly, the lamp post lit while the thumb tack became an irritant. The bartender gave them all some tea spiked with Rakia.

The most noticeable protuberance stuck out like a sore thumb as it was exactly that, a sore thumb. The owner of said sore thumb stubbed it, much as one does with one's toes.

What two does with her toes is a different question altogether.

If SpaceX manages to send unmanned BFRs to Mars in 2022; that summer I will be celebrating having lived 17897 days on my birthday. I think perhaps that year I would want to travel down to Texas or Florida, or wherever the launches are, just to be there for one of them. It is one thing to watch these launches on the interweb; it must be a wholly different experience to be there when it happens. A safe distance close, that is.

A regurgitation of a slice of sour eloquence was the least concern of the people who invaded stealthily the peaceful bi-dimensional numeric plane with a shortened whip.

So, was it the stealthily invading people who had the whip, or, was it the bi-dimensional numeric plane? More importantly, how smelly was the bi-dimensional numeric plane once the regurgitation had been spilled upon it?

There were a number of weather systems that decided to take a leak. Others of their brethren let out some gaseous emanations. Their cousins dropped their temperature while their deviant siblings raised theirs. The grandfather weather system simply whisked complacently. All of this meant that here where I live we received 10-12cm's of snow followed by 4-6mm of freezing rain followed by 5-10mm of rain followed by the temperature dropping below zero again to make that slushy mess a frozen treachery.

An alpaca and a llama went bowling last week in lane seven while lanes 1-6 were occupied by the chimpanzee bowling league. Unsurprisingly, the alpaca got a higher bowling score; something to do with the number of 'a's.

A photographer once used a pair of seven sided dice in a bowl painted cherry blue to use as a backdrop for a foreground that was reminiscent of a background that had been put in front. The subject of the photograph with all of that behind it blinked twice, each time at precisely the shutter time. A refund was asked for, but the fun, taken out of fund, leaves only a 'd' and this was not accepted.

Sometime in 2019 I will be firing my financial advisor. All assets to move to three ETFs. I am waiting for the dust to settle; mostly it is the 1% transaction fees that I see on my statements where a month's worth of dividend and other distributions are almost completely negated by the fees. I expect opposing arguments to my decision; I have not yet prepared any refutations to those opposing arguments, but ultimately it is my decision.

I noticed three instances of people wearing camo trousers within the last thirty-two hours. I own exactly zero camo-style apparel. If I was to acquire camo pants of my own, I do believe I would also need to acquire alternative footwear to what I currently own - something that would match well with the camo; and also, a mono-colour army green t-shirt to wear as the top to make it a full outfit. At this moment, and for the foreseeable future, I am on a spend zero strategy; so this camo apparel plan will have to wait.

There are exceptions to the spend zero strategy, namely
-Groceries
-Fuel and car maintenance
-Rent, utilities, internet and mobile device
-Eating out - limited to twice a month
-Fees associated with my kids education

How is it that a balloon factory doesn't just rise up into the air?

Tickets for the 2020 Olympics go on sale in the Spring. I am looking forward to this.